Lunch

My husband is a wonderful man and loving father. He also reminds me that I do pretty durn well as a mom. When he travels, which is frequent as he is a pilot, I am left to care for and coordinate the lives of our three kids. I work hard, maybe too hard, to get it right. Over the past eleven years I have often lost sight of my needs in my determination to do this mothering thing right. Whatever that means.

Today I was working. I'm a life coach and work from my home office. I helped get the day started, helped prioritize what needed to get done, helped make a plan. Then I was busy. I popped out for bathroom breaks and lunch, but I wasn't involved in the details of family life. I was working. That was the deal. It was my husband's day to care for the kids and keep the house running smoothly.

To his credit and my appreciation, he finished the bread I started, kept the laundry going, and worked on getting our new computer working. Transferring files and what-all can be a pain. He is very focused and enjoys that sort of task.

He also forgot to feed the kids.

When I finished at 3:30p I discovered two cranky kids fighting, and the third begging for cheese. Then I learned that Little Dudely had half a grapefruit (which I had prepared) at 8a and then chips and salsa for "breakfast" around 10a. No lunch. Dee Dee prepared a bowl of cereal with fruit for herself in the late morning. No lunch. Pookie did get her regular breakfast and the kiwi & cheese part of lunch. But that's it. Even my husband was hungry. He had made a bowl of soup for himself, but needed more.

Now I am the first to point out that Dee Dee and Little Dudely, never mind my husband!, are capable of fending for themselves. I have been encouraging them to be more self-sufficient in the kitchen, and Dee Dee even prepared most of dinner last night. However, they often need to be reminded to eat. Extreme crankiness is often the first sign of plunging blood-sugar levels. Our kids need regular inputs of, oh say, a piece of fruit mid-morning, or a well-rounded lunch followed by a light snack to run smoothly and happily.

So at 3:30p it was clear that they wouldn't make it to dinner. The popcorn maker on the counter, and the erupting battles and screaming made that clear. (Which isn't to say epic battles and screaming never happen when they are well fed...) Granola bars and fruit for Dee Dee and Little Dudely (and dad). A bowl of mac and cheese for Pookie. Phew! Situation stabilized.

So what did I learn? Well, nothing too horrible happens when you get so absorbed in what you're doing that you forget to feed the family. It's not pretty, but maybe next time the kids won't be so reliant on the adults around here to think of everything. Maybe I do a little too much to make everything just right. Maybe I can relax that standard for myself and have a little more fun...